I called the pastor and asked him to fill me in on what was going on, which he did, but then I never called the family and got their side of the story. Instead, armed with all I needed from the pastor I began to return calls to the media and explain what the Church’s teaching was on this matter – that the Host had to be wheat and couldn’t be anything else and that the child would just have to receive from the cup. I explained that we Catholics believe that the fullness of the Eucharistic presence is found in both the Host and the chalice and that while it was unfortunate that the child could not receive the Host, he could surely receive from the chalice.
Sounded pretty straight-forward and reasonable. The problem was that I really didn’t stop and consider that we were dealing with a family and a little boy, not a theological case study. My whole attitude was wrong-headed. It wasn’t what I said, it was how I said it. When I was interviewed by local television and radio, my manner came across as “I don’t know what the problem is for the family” and that they were some how being unreasonable. “The little boy can receive from the cup.” Case closed.
Never mind that all the other children were receiving a Host at communion. Never mind that the family was receiving mixed messages because other pastors in the archdiocese were, unfortunately, using rice hosts and no one had bothered to correct this. Never mind that none of the other children at First Communion were being offered the cup as well. Never mind that in the little boy’s parish the cup was not offered to the laity as normal practice at any Mass during the week. Never mind that our whole Catholic Eucharistic practice for centuries has focused on the Host and not on the cup, especially for the laity. Never mind that in religious ed. classes and catechesis, the children heard over and over again about how they were going to receive the Host, “the little white guest.” Never mind that I didn’t bother to sit down and listen to the family tell their side of the story and the struggles that they have had with food allergies and protecting their child from food that he cannot eat and how finally, it looked like they had a solution to his being able to receive the Host but then, they didn’t. Never mind that I forgot that we were talking about a little boy.
The family left the Church. They joined another Christian community that used rice hosts. I continued working as the Director of the Office of Worship. I am embarrassed to say that it took the years of the clergy sex abuse scandal to really change my focus away from issues/theology/ecclesiology as my starting point to the person, the pastoral, first. You would think that a priest would understand that, but I was too job and task centered. When there was a person right in front of me, that was one thing, but if I was asked a question, I often went “policy” or theoretical. I had to learn that in all things with the Church and human life, it is important to start with the person, which I didn’t do with that family. I don’t know if the outcome would have been different if I had listened to them first. I couldn’t tell them it was okay to use a rice host. The only one who could give permission for a host made of anything but wheat is the pope, not me, not any other priest, not any bishop. Church teaching is very strict on this and has been for centuries. But, maybe if I had listened to them, I could have worked with his pastor and parish to make the little boy’s communion from the cup a more normal practice for the whole community.
In my former parish, we made it a practice to offer low-gluten hosts (approved by the USCCB for use) at all the Masses to those who needed them. This was not just for the few people in the parish community who were gluten intolerant. Many times after Mass I would have guests come forward and tell me how welcome they felt in being able to receive the low gluten host at a parish other than their own. When I first came on board as pastor, the cup was not offered to the laity at any of the Masses. That soon changed. Now the cup is offered at every Mass. Working with the religious ed. director, we changed the manner in which the children were prepared for First Communion so that when we spoke of Communion we made every effort to speak of the Host and the cup. At meetings with parents we explained that we would be offering both the Host and the cup at First Communion and that they could make the decision as to whether or not their child would receive from the cup. As it turned out, about half the children did receive from the cup. We changed the altar wine that we used to one that was sweeter and less apt to be too bitter for children’s taste. We also had a little girl in the parish who was allergic to wheat and could only receive from the cup. She received her First Communion with her classmates and continues to receive from the cup at every Mass.
As more and more children and adults are found to have food allergies, we as Catholics need to look at our Eucharistic practices to make sure that we make every effort to be as inclusive as we can be. This involves paying attention to matters of hospitality, attitude, and catechesis. While we cannot use anything but wheat hosts for the Eucharist, we can certainly change many things to make it easier for those who cannot receive the Host to still receive Communion from the cup as a normal practice not just for them but for all who worship in faith.